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Friday, March 16, 2012

Thursday Love: Does Body Count Really Matter?

Jewel of wisdom du jour: "Everybody has a past, some more intense than others. But it's in the past. You're not what you've done."

So what exactly is a "body count"? The "body count" is the number of people you've slept with. Along with the "body count" comes the "rule of 3". The "rule of 3" states that when a woman tells a man her "body count" then you have to multiply the number they give you by 3 in order to get their real number...and that for men...you have to divide their number by 3. Why is that? Because generally speaking women lie downward on the number they've been with and men lie upward on their number; because society has put such a big stigma on the number of sexual partners someone has had. I don't really believe in the rule of 3...but it is kind of funny when you think about it the generalization that women lie about how few men they've slept with while men lie about sleeping with many women.

Thursday Love Disclaimer: "Here at The Fashionisette...we're not encouraging promiscuity at all....and if you're planning on having sex...make sure you're of legal consenting age and do so in a safe manner."

So should the number of people someones slept with have that large of an impact on how you view that person? I personally don't like to judge someone based on something like that alone. Think about it....perhaps you meet someone who's had 12 different partners but they're in their 40's...that doesn't exactly tell you as much about that person as if say they were 18 with 12 different partners!

The only time I feel that this number truly matters is when someone is getting into a committed relationship, they and their partner should be able to have that conversation openly and honestly. Keep in mind though that some people take this very seriously and if the "body count" is too high...they'll wipe their hands of the situation and walk away...while others don't care what the number is. I don't advocate lying about this number either....if the person you're with isn't mature enough to know that you had a past before them...then they're probably not the right person to be with anyway.

But a word to the wise...knowing the stigma that having many sexual partners can bring and that there are many people who seriously care how many people you've slept with in the past, make smart decisions because you don't want to develop a negative reputation and you don't want your past decisions to possibly have a negative impact on what could be a good relationship.

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